depravity.

for weeks I have been deprived of sleep, the very essence of action and life.

without energy to keep my eyes open, i see the world with a new perspective.. and a heart that mimics Christ's beats to provide the rhythm to a new day.  in my depravity, i find that i am nearer my intended design.  instead of yearning for sleep, i yearn for Christ.  he is my source.  my beginning and my end.  my everything. the weight of my eyes mirrors the weight of my affection.  i am a being that craves love.  and the heart of the father.  compassion is my core, i have been created to seek perfection, though never obtaining it.. knowing that it is enough to brush the robe of the one who calls me his beloved.  he is my perfection.  and i am in a perpetual dream state.  heaven beckons and my eternity lingers near.  the time is right.  the place is fitting.  to seek the one true love and call him home, into the heart that is rightfully his.

All I want.

All I want is to know God.

To really press in and stay there.

To drown in the ocean of His relentless love..

until all else fades into the background.

For without God, where will my love come from?

Where will I find the capacity to have compassion?

Where will I find life, meaning, value?

And who will I love?

He is the reason I live.

He is the reason I dance..

the reason I sing

and have truth.

But overall, He's the reason I know love..

and the reason I know how to love.

This is where I wish to stay.

This moment is sheer bliss.  When He is so present that everything else seems to melt away into a fictitious overlay that barely brushes the surface of reality.  This is where I wish to stay.. the sun warming the earth and my thoughts as I am so lovingly revealed the concealed nature of the One who knit me so flawlessly.  This is where I wish to stay.  Where my world is aligned with the rhythm of the vivacious heart of the Father and I am allowed to breathe deep of the truth.  This is where I wish to stay.  But today I will place this moment in a locket to wear around my neck, nearest my heart.  For He is always with me, and there I will forever stay.