The Irony of Life

It's strange to feel disconnected from God when I am in a program in which I'm in His presence 24/7.

With production rehearsals consuming our final days before outreach, I've found having Jesus time a lot more difficult and scarce but a great revelation blossomed from it. This is what the real world is going to be like.  Am I going to be able to "fit in" time with God when I'm working 40+ hours a week, when life hits me upside the face?  I would hate to say that I would have to fit him in, pre-plan my time and "pencil God in."  Of all the things that I have learned while at DTS, perhaps the most important and revolutionary idea that I have adopted and begun to live out would be the fact that Christ is truly my best friend and he's completely real!  He never lets me down, always listens to me when I'm upset, sticks with me when I'm a brat, and even answers my stupid questions such as, "Why is the sky blue?"  He is faithful and never ceases to amaze me even when I don't deserve an ounce of his affection.

So, if Jesus is my best friend, why wouldn't I want to spend time with him all the time?  When I can speak of how awesome Jesus is (you know, he's a rebel and intellectual and super cool..), why wouldn't I want to chill with him more?  It's like when you have a best friend that you think is off-the-chain, and all you can do is talk about how stellar they are and you are attached at their hip.  That's how I want my relationship with Christ to be.  That's the basis behind this blog.  Although life is tough and time is scarce, there will always be time for Jesus.. because without Jesus, there is no life.

Soak up the Sun

Boston in the Spring is absolutely breathtaking.  Everywhere I turn, there are flowers in bloom, budding trees and birds of all kinds greeting me.  I have never seen so many varieties of flowers and trees coming from Wyoming; I'm in awe every time I step out my front door.

And the weather, oh the weather.  Lately it has been in the 80's which is much needed after the long, numbing winter.  My YWAM family and I have been taking full advantage of the gorgeous weather that God has given us, complete with hippie hand-washing clothes parties in the courtyard, Magic at the playground, tanning, swinging, evening lawn Lost watching (similar to a drive in, only no one has a car).. etc.

I am so in love with nature.  God did an excellent job.  Now all I need to do is go camping.. that's on the top of my list when I get back to Wyoming in August.

Lovin' every moment.

Exponential Potential.

Somewhere along the line, I obtained a new found obsession with the Old Testament, believe it or not, because everyone else seems to find it tedious and drawn out.  I think it is compelling and fascinating despite the fact that I have never given it much more than a bird's eye view before, merely turning to it for church or lecture reference.  I find it a blessing, however, that God has instilled a passion in my soul to dig deep into these classic stories and find the humanity of the characters; they are just like me!  And what's better is the reality!

Currently, I am chillin' out in Exodus doing a full-blown dissection of Moses.  As a baby his life gets spared, he gets adopted by the king of Egypt's daughter, and has it pretty much made, or so it seems.  Finally, when he stumbles out of the palace and realizes that his people (the Israelites) are getting beat up, he decides it's time to do something.. along the lines of killing an Egyptian.  Okay: rewind.  Moses killed someone?  Couldn't he have just gone to the king and let him know that he had a problem with the way the Israelites were being treated?  I mean, he had an ins with the palace AND the king's daughter (his adoptive mother).

This is when things start to get heated and Moses ends up fleeing for his life and landing in Midian where he eventually marries Jethro's daughter Zipporah.  By this point, his problems in Egypt have disappeared and Moses is kickin' it with Jethro's flocks, doing his thing and keeping it real.  Fast forward to a seemingly normal day on Mt. Sinai.. until a burning bush appears which never burns up.  That's when God spoke to Moses.. how incredible, I love it.  Moses is probably just looking around dumbfounded thinking, "where did that come from?" and I always love the way the Bible puts their response, "Here I am."  I don't think he was that calm.  So God gives Moses this epic adventure that he is supposed to partake on, more so just letting the Israelites know that the God of Abraham is going to set them free and telling the king that it's okay to let all the slaves take off for three days to offer sacrifices.  Easy stuff, right?  This is the point where Moses FREAKS.  I would too.  I'm sure he's thinking, "God, are you crazy?  I just got ran out of the country AND I suck at speaking AND there is no way you'll get me to go back when I have no clue who you are, you've got to find someone else."  However, Moses quickly found that you don't tell God what he can or can't do through you.

Then come the miracles.  The staff turning into a snake, Moses' hand being consumed by a skin disease and then quickly healed, water turning to blood, etc. and Moses doesn't freak out at this.. but I think they just left that part out to make Moses look more manly.  I wanna know if he passed out, screamed, cried, what!  Honestly, he has no emotion at this point but I know he was feeling something.

Then comes the Dream Team: Moses and Aaron.  Moses gets the God-thing, hearing his voice and what not, Aaron gets to be the poster child, you know, repeat what Moses gets from God, a figure-head if you will.  So the two of them set out to do what God asked and they are NOT pleasantly surprised.  Of course, the Israelites are super stoked that God is going to rescue them but, hold up!  There is no way that the king is going to allow them to leave and Moses has to confront God in all of his frustration.. it did not happen the way it was supposed to!

Moses is ticked!

Okay. So that's enough for now.  Moses is so much like we are.  He was impulsive when he killed an Egyptian, doubting when he challenged God on what he was called to do, freaked out when God performed miracles in front of him, prideful and full of insecurities when he said he was the wrong choice for the mission, and super peeved when things didn't turn out the way he wanted them to.. and he still has a book in the Bible devoted to his journey with God.

Wow.

Outreach Update

Outreach update:

Date: April 15, 2009

Place: East Boston

What: Doors Drama/No Holding Back Evangelism

Why: To show the world God's amazing, unending love for them and to dramatically change their lives through the truth

Pulling up to Maverick Landing and gazing down the rows and rows of houses in the projects, we prepared our hearts to do some Jesus lovin' and boy did God rock that place.  We saw 27 first time commitments to Christ and 4 re-dedications and witnessed to people from 11 nations. FO SHO.

fear

Why is it that the one thing we fear takes the longest to kill us?

Landing after hours on my monotonous flight back to Boston, I began to realize that every person surrounding me and perhaps on the entire plane immediately took out their phones and began calling everyone they knew.  Often times I wonder if it's just an excuse to feel connected again.  I have done the same.  Sitting on a flight for mere hours by yourself is a little unsettling with no one to converse with so the first instinct is to banish that alone feeling by scrolling through your list of contacts and pressing 'talk'.  Now if only everything in life had a button like that.  Maybe it should say 'attention' instead.  We are all terrified of the prospect of being alone.  Of this I am sure, if I were to live this life out alone, I would have died years ago.  But that's part of the saving grace, I've got a God that's always on the receiving end of my 'attention' call even when I don't deserve it.. that's the secret of never being alone.

What it means to fly.

There's just something about airplanes that makes me wonder if I could ever fly.

With a vast ocean of serene clouds below me and warm rays of sun permeating the thin window separating me from heaven, I've dreamt of conversing with Jesus in that very setting. What is heaven? Is it the very moment when you see Jesus face to face, forever locked in awe and love for a Savior so selfless? If so, I've already been to heaven and back. In fact, I take a trip to heaven every time I close my eyes and find myself wrapped in His light, sharing His vision and heart for the world. Who's to say that Jesus is a distant being, to me, He's numbingly real. All He's waiting for is us to bridge the gap, take the plunge, throw away our inhibitions, our doubts, and to believe in His love so evident. Then you will find heaven completely tangible.. and a love that will never break your heart.

So go ahead, fly.
What have you got to lose?

Write Truth First on the Tablet of One's Own Heart

One 

of the 

hardest 

things 

in life 

is 

having

words

in your

heart

you can't

utter.

-James Earl Jones